Sorrento & Capri (by Rach)

Getting to Sorrento

Now you might not know this about me but I am a worrier. Every time someone has booked a flight to come and see us I basically go into panic mode. I look at the route from where we are to the destination multiple times, working out how quickly we could get there, how slowly we could get there, what would we do if the engine fell out or the back half of the van dropped into the sea – could we still feasibly get there? I keep most of this a secret from Sean of course, so I was delighted when he suggested that we should travel to Sorrento a day early and park about 20 minutes from where my mom and mister were meeting us.

*Warning* Brummies like us tend to say mom instead of mum, I know it’s annoying but you’ll have to put up with it dear.

We decided to treat ourselves to a toll road down to Sorrento because it would be much easier and more relaxing than the coastal route. Oh how naïve we were! It was such a tense drive that I very nearly burst into tears. We had a few close calls, with one guy drifting right over into our lane with absolutely no warning. I blasted my horn and gesticulated wildly – he was absolutely not bothered.

We passed yet another multi-car crash, it was just unbelievable.

We finally arrived in Sorrento. Sean had found a parking spot on the side of the coastal road and there was a man with an iced lemonade stand (or granite di limone if you really must know) which we happily indulged in after a hot stressful journey. The lemon man was blasting some truly horrendous Euro-trash music but he was loving life and it rubbed off onto us (not literally) as we mock-danced around the van. I hung all of our washing out – tying a string from the van to the railings – trampy yet effective. My Mom and Sister Zoe will arrive tomorrow, I can’t wait!

The Fam

In order to disperse some of my anxious, over excited energy, I cleaned the inside of the van and had another Granita Di Limone. We then set off on the nail-biting 20 minute journey to Sorrento. I always feel tense driving in tourist hot spots because they’re so densely populated, I’m like a meerkat constantly on watch for a sneaky moped in my blindspot or a child wandering into the road.

Aside from the sat nav trying to send us down a lane barely wide enough for a Smart car, we made it to the hotel safely in one huge Sprinter-shaped piece. We were allowed to park directly outside the hotel – the dream! Thanks again 'La Pergola Sorrento'!

Mom and Zoe arrived at the hotel which was so surreal! It had been almost a whole year since we’d last seen each other! Hugs were hugged and tears were teared. We went into Sorrento for dinner where Zoe promptly knocked a whole glass of coke onto my mom's pizza. What a little bitch.

A very busy day indeed

Sean had surprised us all by joining us for breakfast but after realising that it was a continental offering only, he made the tough decision to stay in bed in the mornings for the rest of the week. We decided that the first thing we should do on our holiday was absolutely nothing but sit by the pool and order drinks on my moms credit card.

We then had showers (such luxury!) and went for a lovely meal – including one of the best cheesecakes of my life. I was so full I could barely waddle to our new favourite bar (@bananasplitsorrento – it has 2 Labradors and fabulous cocktails, what more could we need). I had a water which only served to bloat me even more so we went back and I flopped on the bed and let Sean rub my belly with the aircon on full blast.

Capri – Sun

What a day! We took a boat to Capri where we snorkled in crystal clear water. They sailed the boat through ‘The Tunnel of Love’ and told us we had to kiss the whole way through to ensure our love lasts. We’re not really PDA people but tradition is tradition so we had an awkward smooch in the presence of my mother, sister, random tourists and the boat crew. I later learned from the owner of the Banana Split Bar, that when you kiss in the Tunnel of Love “you will be 3”. Hopefully if we clear out one of the pan drawers in the van we can stick the baby in there..

We docked on the beautiful island of Capri and decided to walk to the main bit because the funicular (that’s like a mountainside cable car thing) was €12 each! It was only a billion steps in blistering heat, well worth the saving. I turned around to see my mom look like she wanted to cry and punch someone (probably us) at the same time! She’s a smoker and works in an office, I think the climb nearly killed her. Zoe, long of limb as my mom calls her, took it in her stride. We finally reached the top, sweating so much it looked like we’d been caught in the rain. We went to the first bar we saw and paid about €24 for 4 soft drinks. 

We wandered around Capri which was gorgeous and quite fancy, full of designer shops I wouldn’t dream of stepping foot inside – even if I hadn’t been profusely sweating. We sailed back to the mainland happy and burned. We had a nice meal out and spent the evening laughing our heads off, finally meandering back to the hotel via the Labrador cocktail bar (of course) so that Zoe could stroke the dogs and say “I want one!” over and over again.

Their last day

We decided that the last thing we should do on our holiday was absolutely nothing but sit by the pool and order drinks on my mom's credit card.

The hotel recommended a lovely garden restaurant to us where even Sean had a dessert. The fat pig. We headed to the Labrabar for many, many ‘last ones’ followed by an even ‘lasterer one’ at the hotel. It was 2am by the time we said our goodbyes – poor mom and Zo had to leave for the airport at 6am.

I woke up at 5.30am to pop and say an even lasterer goodbye to my older and younger doppelgangers. Young Zoe was in a foul mood because she didn’t have enough time for a shower, so that was nice. I might make her live on the van for a few days when we get back, she’ll really value a shower then.

Our last day

I went back to bed for a bit and then got up to go for a lonesome free breakfast (I say free, it was included in the price of the rooms, which mom and Zoe paid for. So yeah, free.) I smuggled some ham rolls up to Sean who was still fast asleep. I’m sure if I’d asked they’d have been fine with me taking him some food but sometimes it’s a treat to be a bit naughty. The hotel even gave us an extra hour in our room which was lovely because trying to wake Sean up after too many drinks is like trying to reanimate the dead. 

We left the luxury of Sorrento behind and drove to Pompeii…

Recommended bar in Sorrento:

https://g.page/banana-split-sorrento?share